H!P, isilie related, Morning Musume

In Which Itsumo Genki is (still) 11 Years Old: Quotes


YAY! Still eleven years old here at Itsumo Genki! In the interest of looking back (to when I was funny) and to remind myself of some memorable moments (in the posts I might not have thought were necessarily the best), let’s look at some quotes.

Yes. Quotes.

Of me.

My only defense of such vanity is, some of this might make you laugh.
Also, ELEVEN YEARS BABY!!

Hope you enjoy some of these and maybe check out a few more posts that didn’t get listed last time.

Thanks for visiting and bearing with my celebrations…

YAAAAAAAY!!!

—2008—

What we needed for this [pv, Mikan,]…is something along the lines of ‘Aruiteru’. Get them outside. Maybe at a carnival. Have them interacting as a group, doing silly things. If you must have the windmill dance, then have them meet on stage at the end of a lot of hijinx and do it.

Granted Winky would…wink. Ai wouldn’t really know what to do with herself and Koharu would just plain have a seizure, but wouldn’t it be so much more fun?

From: ‘It Happened One Morning

I’m sorry, I can deal with 12 year olds, like Tsuji and Niigaki because they had sempais to back them up. People there to take care of them. Putting a bunch of kids together and then proclaiming one of them leader at random?? Why don’t you just throw a sugary snack in front of Koharu??? Same sort of insanity…

In the newest Berryz single [Ghengis Khan], when Risako told us all to raise our hands with her, mirrors broke all over the world.

From: Tsunku’s Insanity Series: First Edition – Hello Pro Kidz

On the Sub-leaders…I’m not certain what they do. I suppose they go behind the leader after a command has been given and say, “You heard what she said. Get in line, bitches!”
Only nicer. Cause not everyone finds adding “bitches” to every sentence as funny as I do.”

From: ‘When Tsunku Gets it Right

I was bored with Aruiteru at first, clearly because my brain was experiencing a lack of oxygen or something.”

From: ‘Top Ten: The Perfect Momosu Singles

I don’t think they’re that bad, with the exception of these things: Linlin’s little-miss-muffet hat, Mame’s ill-advised bow, Ai’s scarf (I just don’t get why it’s there) and Winky’s giant shirt with a belt.

[You don’t need a mumu Reina, you’re tiny. If anything you need to eat some bacon before somebody splits you in half.]”

From: ‘In Which Isilie is Worried about Naichau Kamo

 

About Matsuura Aya: “Let’s not forget that she once danced with puppets in a towel and can order bad-ass Mikitty around as easily as Yuuko could break Koharu into quivering molecules with a single, withering look.

From: ‘In Which Isilie is Perplexed by the Future

 

—2009—

Tsuji mentioned on her blog that she goes out to eat with Yossy and Rika a lot.
Apparently Rika makes Noa cry. That made me laugh for about five minutes.”

“Kemeko + Tsuji + chuu = KAWAII!!
Or maybe just people running away.

From: ‘Farewell Almost

A lot of the fan questions though made me cringe, but since I play the devil’s advocate even against myself, I do admit that if Yossy (for example) were in the same room as me and giving me her full attention, the only semblance of coherence I’d be able to muster would be the helpless muffled squeaks I’d let out as I slowly melted into a puddle of pwned mush.

From: ‘In Which Isilie Catches Up

I understand that pretending a chair is the object of your bittersweet love is a bit much, but at least try. Don’t pout and pose and look like the chair just refused to buy you a new purse.

From: ‘Platinum 9 Disco Concert ~ Gaki Made me do This

[On the lyrics to Kimagure Princess] “Ahem. My Japanese is limited; I could be completely off. Still. There is mature and then there is ENOUGH ALREADY.

From: ‘Princess is a Cowgirl

 

–2010–

“I think H!P only remembers to use different costumes when they are going to have a concert. Then suddenly it’s all, “I’ve got some feather-dusters lying around!”
“Yeah, I’ve got some glitter-glue!”
“PIPE CLEANERS!”
“OLD CAKE DECORATIONS!!!”
“BANZAIIIII-” “

From: ‘Momusu Goes Outside Again

JJ, sweetie, let Sayu have the head-devouring bows, ok? You’re too pretty to let accessories eat your face.”

“I won’t even talk about Winky, You all should know my issues with her: too many accessories, moments of squirrel voice, general fail…we just won’t go there this time”

From: ‘Pika Pika – A Mini Review

 

–2011–

This was the first year that Tsunku gave us two original albums. I don’t think he’s ever given us two Momusu albums in a year, unless you count the cover album or the 7.5 thing (and most people don’t).

From: ‘In Which Isilie Reviews 2010

The thing is, TakaLin really does seem like a OTP. This is really the first time I’ve understood the concept of the OTP. And I don’t mean in some dirty fanfiction-written-by-the-light-of-a-candle-out-in-the-garden-shed way. I mean in a ‘they-are-totally-freakin’-sisters- kinda way.

From: ‘I Miss Takalin

Don’t mistake me here, I still think she is the cutest thing since Nacchi with a bunny (I’d post that pic, but the cute-gasm would destroy the internet), but on some of these shots she looks a bit like a school-master shaking her finger.

From: ‘Maji Desu ka Ska!? XD FIN-ally!‘, regarding Mitsui

Let’s focus in on ONE event, because otherwise this will just be a collection of caps with the word PWN underneath each one (you know…moreso).”

“Well, Ohno gives a lame, half-assed kick……Which gives them the only score they end up with. It’s only twenty points, but Ohno doesn’t care what you think. He’s made his point. Especially since Nino keeps kicking it so hard it entirely misses the target and comes back to hit him. This happens twice. Oh Nino…why do you fail so hard?”

From: ‘In Which Isilie’s World Explodes from Awesome

Have the main vocalists be the agents, ala Buono in My Boy and have the rest in the getaway vehicle, frantically running around trying to protect them from the guards. There could be lots of crazy technology in there (it doesn’t have to make much sense – it’s H!P. I mean Buono was fighting to get CAKE for crying out loud!) and maybe we could get to see Shige with some kind of rocket-launcher. How epic would that be? Dance-shot it up, but give everybody some way to shine.

And don’t tell me that’s too violent for H!P. Momo gassed a damn bunny in that Buono dvd. And she was grinning the whole time. Actually, they gassed someone in the My Boy pv too…”

From: ‘Only You Part Two: The PV

I’m pretty sure I could take you, Winky. Especially if you’re half in the bag.

From: ‘Only You Part Three: Picspam‘ in response to a pic of Winky’s fist

This made no sense, just like Mini Moni doing Gatamekira. It’s a group called Sexy ADULT-jan and you’ve got two grade-school kids singing about an adult loneliness. Miki doesn’t buy it either. It’s a great song, don’t get me wrong. But little Oatbag has NO idea why she’s there. And Murakami works it, but trust me, she didn’t understand it either. I get that this is a thing in Japan, but again, the only reason it was done is because you had Miki in there. Remember when they went on Utaban and Ishibashi was like, ‘Do you two even know what you’re singing?’

From: ‘In Which H!P Has (de)Evolved‘; my at the time very controversial opinion on Sexy Otan-jan

Yossy doesn’t need to USE the Force – she IS the Force.

From 2011’s ‘Pic Spam: Reconquisto

“Biyuuden: when choreography meant ‘lie there and giggle’.”

From: ‘Pic Spam: Motivation

If you need convincing, let’s count the number of solo lines, solo songs, photobooks, photos in general, starring roles in plays and so on and so on…

Oh, wait, you CAN’T because there isn’t a number that the human brain can fathom that is HIGH enough to equal the amount of all those!!!!!”

From: ‘Ai-Chan the Soloist?‘ on the reasons people thought Takahashi Ai would go solo after graduating from Momusu

 

–2012–

There is a reason that it sounds like something new for Momusu – because S/mileage is the group that usually does those!!…Ever think maybe he just messed up and sent the wrong songs to the wrong groups?
I mean, what is anyone going to do about it, right?

-From: ‘In Which Isilie Wonders About this Project Part of H!P

Mame herself has commented that she likes the ‘cool type’ songs the best, so I’m glad she got her catchy, dub-step anthem (what the hell is that exactly? All I can gather is that it refers to that squealing sound in the beginning – you know, that sound of a surprised robot?).”

“Shige continues to amaze me. Year after year both her and Tsunku agree that she is hopeless at singing and not much better at dancing and yet…look at her go. It’s not even a matter[of do] I like her or not; I have to notice her. No Guns, super pwn. Learn from her kiddies.

From: ‘Renai Hunter: One Awesome Send-off

The hair styling is fierce, minus Winky’s stupid bow, but I’m trying my best to avoid looking at her anyway.”

“I don’t see this lasting too long. We’re already getting the eleventh generation here. Why don’t you just get a giant cane and yank our last two senpai off the stage? It’d be a bit more subtle…

From: ‘A Rant, A Short Review, and Queen Shige

Everyone keeps mentioning that her hairstyle is the same as Shige’s in her infamous photobook. To which I say…

Yeah. And? It looks awesome.”

From: ‘One Two Three Robo-Musume

This is not to say that my friends aren’t tolerant of my interests. In fact, they’ve been wonderful about it, even going as far as to play Perfume’s album GAME one night to cheer me up (although, I will never ever live down Chocolate Disco, or my passionate attempts to explain how that title makes even the slightest bit of sense).

From: ‘Isilie on Blogging

I often find her lifeless. It’s like she can’t tap into the emotions of a song, so she just tries to look cute…which is fine, if you…you know, dance or something. And did you notice you can pause a live performance at practically any line she sings and find some kind of fail-face going on?

From: ‘In Which Isilie Explains Her Whole Reina Thing

Too fast. Yep. Where was the training camp? Why bother announcing anyone else if the next minute you’ll just announce the winner anyway? It’s like it all happened in secret and now that One.Two.Three’s promotion has bankrupted the company we can distract people with this!

From: ‘Welcome Oda Sakura! (and other stuff)!!

What the hell is goin’ on with yo FAYCE Winky??? Sorry, but this is disgusting…

Don’t look at me like that. Your cat ears are stupid.

From: ‘Chaaaaaaaaaaaaaance prt2 Temporary Pic Spam

 

—2013—

I expect [Reina] to get a lavish graduation concert, with so many accessories that the giant-bow-shaped stage ends up looking like some sort of shiny monster with floating heads and limbs.

From: ‘This isn’t Really About Mano

The strange dissonance in the verses is jarring, especially since the song starts out promising “2000 people on da dance floor”. Did you mean people, or scary robots?

From: ‘Brainstorming and KimiSae etc

Please don’t put the songs on a pedestal. Since when did these songs become part of a different group? They’re Momusu songs, not OG songs. Yes, the group had many incarnations, but it’s all part of the same legacy. The OG members know this and accept that the songs they made famous will be taken on by new members. We should too.

I had to grit my teeth and stop swearing at the tv when I saw Winky get Yossy’s lines AND Takahashi’s lines in Egao Yes Nude. If I can live through that, I can take anything Tsunku’s got.

From: ‘In Which Isilie is Behind the Momusu Updates

 

—2014—

I’m not sure anything bothers Masaki-kins, except sitting still, being quiet, or doing as she’s told.

From: ‘Momusu Goes Chicky-Boom

 

—2015—

Oh, and some other stuff happened in H!P too. Ask the question: “What changed?” and the answer is “What didn’t?” Some of it…ANGERS me.

*rimshot*”

From: ‘In Which Isilie Reviews 2014~

Here’s an idea: put the girls in some sort of situation. Very few props are needed. Then let them use their established or developing characters to react to it. Simple as that. Yes, include dance-shot and close-ups, but there is plenty you can do inbetween.

From: ‘Ah the Transition Phase: Shibue Shuuhei Gives us the Real Seishun PV

Honestly, there is so much hair in the dance-shots that even I was raising an eyebrow (isilie loves hair-flippy moments, remember).”

“Having Eri-pon in the dance was another surprise. I love that she’s getting a chance to be featured here and she takes to it with her usual bewildering mix of determination and anxiety.”

“There were so many shots of the safety-pants-flash I couldn’t even include them all. It makes you feel like a sukebe (dirty old perve).”

“Does [Zukki] look a little different to you? I mean aside from the fact that she’s not in an unflattering paper-bag and she’s ACTUALLY THERE THIS TIME?”

“Frankly, the whole idols-gaining-weight thing is one big, tired mess for me. I read a comment the other day that now Riho is getting fat and it just makes me feel so very tired.”

“If you dislike this because of the predominance of Zukki and BOSS, I have no sympathy for you at all.

Not after the Winky years. Years and years of that winky squirrel and you’re complaining about one third of a single?”

From: ‘Oh! My WISH!

 

— 2016 —

I love their vocals (minus Brat and Chompy, who can sound like they’ve been sucking on helium balloons….and those balloons gave them head-colds *dodges flying objects*) and I love how much power they put into every dance.

Or maybe it’s just Yajima.

From: ‘The H!P Kidz are Movin’ On

 

—2017—

“I didn’t expect this kind of a pv though. I mean, it certainly suits the song, but this is taking the formation dance thing to an absurdly literal place.”

“I also need to point out what many people have pointed out: that she has the same confidence and sly ambition as Riho and that she sings EXACTLY like Zukki. And her name is Reina.

I mean why don’t you just punch me in the FACE, Momusu!?”

“Be honest: H!P rap is usually a sad, albeit cute, failure, with lots of ‘uh’, ‘like dis’, and ‘you know?’s. Let’s not forget ‘yo, check it out, yo’.”

From: ‘Brand New Ace Formation

 

One more thing, friends…

ISILE-ISMS!!

These are terms and phrases you’ll frequently encounter if you actually read through any of these (or all of these) old posts.

“pwn” = to do something good/cool; apparently this is a gaming term but I just picked it up without knowing any of its original context

“I won’t believe you” = my favourite phrase to say when I want you to have the same opinion as me, because you can’t refute someone who says they aren’t going to believe you.

“egg-layin'” = when a screencap has the girls lookin like they’re doing a sumo-squat (it’s surprising how many routines include sumo-squats)

giant-invisible-sandwich” = when a screencap has the girls with their hands out like they’re about to take a bite of a giant sandwich; pretty sure this idea was taken from a de-motivational poster

– “supreme wtf” – pretty self-explanatory

“Resonant-Blue-Style-Insta-Love” – I loved the song Resonant Blue by Morning Musume INSTANTLY; therefore if I listen to something and instantly love it, I use this phrase

– to “murder” something is to really do a good job; not sure why I used a horrible thing like murder to mean
something good

– “Kimi Sae Robot Bloop” – my nickname for the coupling a-side to Brainstorming (it just still makes me laugh)

-“derp face” – again a word I just adopted without knowing any other contexts; you just have to see it; you can HEAR them barking DERP when you see that face (relax, it’s funny)

 

….Alright, I think I’m done….

WAIT!

Funny pics!

Rika in Biyuuden after she went crazy.

Masaki-kins just screamed for NO reason. Shige is worried but Ayumin straight-up peed herself.

Yossy after she realized she was made of awesome.

I feel like this is a great visual representation of how both the 1st and 2nd Generations reacted to Goto’s entrance.

Miki checkin out Yossy’s underthings…ON STAGE!

Can ya smell what Ishiguro is cookin’?

Accurate.

Some good ol’ timey Winky fail.

A reminder to watch Morning Musume’s Odore Morning Curry tour…cause it’s hawt.

Roman – My Dear Boy: a song about hope and peace, and looking as angry as possible.

Classic gif.
To answer your next question: no, I have no idea what the hell this is all about, but let’s just agree it’s amazing.

A boop.
Iida is your mom. She just is.

Takahashi does NOT want!

Ugh. Risako wants her DIAMONDS! Singing is such a bore…

A screencap that made me choke on a mouthful of tea, have to go spit it into the sink, and then laugh for five minutes.
Utaban is profoundly missed and something you should look into. Now.

The ‘Zukki knows the answer’ gif

 

And of course, Rika’s fanny.

Thank you all for everything these past 11 years. I’ve enjoyed this blog so much, even when it felt like I had nothing worthwhile to contribute. Reading back, I found posts I don’t even remember writing (that actually weren’t too bad) and some captions that still make me laugh. I hope those of you who blog look back some times too and encourage yourselves. Keep writing!!

Here’s to the future!

~Isilie

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