There you go. The title says it all.
Please feel free to skip this entry if you want. It’s all me rambling about why I became a blogger and waxing poetic about what this all means to me. It’s not so much about H!P as it is about me. And self indulgent.
Inspired entirely by the lovely Chiima who wrote something like this herself and then was sweet enough to mention that she reads this blog and likes it.<3 It made my day.
m(_ _)m Thank you! You are so sweet!!! Check her out at Okay! Musume Time. ❤ ❤
I used a blog pic of Ai because she is as pretty and stylish as I wish I could be and apparently as addicted to caffiene as I happen to be. A real pic of me? Nobody needs to see that.
Let’s do this.
I have been blogging since I THINK 2008, or late 2007. At first I really had no idea what I was doing at all. I had no idea exactly what I wanted to write about, how I would write about it and…anything. I barely knew how to include pics. The thing was, I had to find some place to talk about idols. None of my friends like, or I suspect ever will like, idols and to them Japanese anything pretty much equals anime and lol-Japan. I can’t count the number of parties I’ve been to where someone mentions that “Oh, Isilie likes Japan” and then someone else goes, “oooh check out this clip on you tube” and inevitably you get human-tetris or Morning Musume with porkchops strapped to their heads. And no one cares that I know who Tunnelz are or that I know who Momusu is and so on. *sigh* I like anime and all, but it’s hardly the only thing I care about from Japan. People keep asking me if I’ve seen this-or-that, even when I tell them that I’m more into J-dramas than anime. I had one guy hear I like Japan and then just grin at me for five minutes and say, “So you’re into tentacle porn, huh?”
This is what I’m up against people.
This is not to say that my friends aren’t tolerant of my interests. In fact, they’ve been wonderful about it, even going as far as to play Perfume’s album GAME one night to cheer me up (although, I will never ever live down Chocolate Disco, or my passionate attempts to explain how that title makes even the slightest bit of sense). I even got several people into Tramps like Us, my favourite manga of all time (so far anyway). They watched Last Friends with me (and loved it). They put up with me playing Resonant Blue endlessly and singing along. They’ve been completely awesome and in exchange I’ve tried not to force my likes down their throats in any way shape or form. If they’re interested, great, if not, I don’t go on about it.
As a result though, I had no one to share or discuss anything with. And that sucked. I had just gotten into Morning Musume and such and the only person I knew who liked them was my brother, who I lived far away from at the time (this whole thing is his fault, but more on that later).
That’s when, in one of my random searches for more Momusu info, I stumbled across Yoshimi (YOSSHA YOSSHA YOSSHA on my blogroll). It was like a whole new world. I don’t exaggerate here, I’d never read anything about idols. I had no idea people wrote about them this way, or analyzed them, or…anything. I love(d) the way she wrote and I read everything I could. Then I discovered Pink Wota, and her hilarious glossary of terms (no longer there, I think, which is a shame). I read everything of hers that I could find too. Then she led me to International Wota, the site that linked to so many blogs and from which I discovered there was a whole community of fans that loved the same thing(s) I did. Granted, I didn’t always agree with the things written, but even when I didn’t it was interesting, or made me laugh till my stomach hurt.
When you first get into a fandom, particularly an idol fandom, things seem overwhelming. The groups that I got into the most, Momusu (and by extension H!P) and Arashi, had been around for more than eight years already. That is a lot of singles, a ton of promotions, concerts, drama roles, television appearances…That’s not even talking about member changes or the cultural stuff you learn that explains the things you hear in the singles, or the jokes in the television appearances…
Whew. It took awhile before I stopped feeling like I was missing out on everything.
Blogs really, really helped me.
So I decided, after awhile, to make my own.
One of my early headers, in the days where I listened to Resonant Blue non-stop.
I had so much trouble coming up with a name that wasn’t either too boring or already taken. I used this one because if I had to describe myself in weebo terms, I’m pretty much a genki sort of person. Pretty much all of the time. Of course you could also describe me as yankee or just plain crazy, but this one seemed a bit more welcoming.
Plus I noticed that I tended to post about things I liked moreso than anything I didn’t. Momusu doesn’t release things that I don’t like, at least in terms of singles. I’d like to think I take a more positive than a negative view of things.
My main reason for starting to write in here, aside from needing a place to talk about idols, was to communicate with my brother. This was a way to explain things I’d been thinking about and to share my writing with him in a way that I hadn’t really been able to. I’m always telling people I write all the time, but I rarely show it to people. He was my first and, for a long while, my only reader. I knew he was really the only audience and so it was easier to express myself. I stopped worrying about flames or things like that. This let me find my style. PV cap-fest reviews, pic spams of things I thought were funny, thoughtful pieces about events or people…I even found myself writing essay-type posts. I wouldn’t have continued if he hadn’t been reading. As much as it was for me, it was very encouraging to have someone reading it and giving me feedback. Enjoying it, even.
Then International Wota featured something I wrote. I can’t even remember what the first piece was, but I was absolutely floored. Flattered. I nearly cried. PEOPLE WERE READING SOMETHING I WROTE!!!
I never thought anyone would read this, or like it, or think that my ramblings made any sense. IW has been so important to so many of us, simply by making others aware we exist. I think many blogs would agree. It brought me to a lot of awesome blogs that I might never have found otherwise. Some very kind things have been said about my writing on there and it means so much to me. Thank you to everyone from IW and now IdolMinded. ❤ Because of this, people actually read this. I actually have traffic…people have put me on the blogroll… I feel so grateful.
I used to hammer out posts a lot faster, but now that I work full-time, it gets harder to make them current and I don’t write unless I have something to say. My brother is still my first and most important reader, btw. When I haven’t posted in too long, he is still the one pushing me forward. I take a lot of time on these, especially the pv posts. I like my caps, but I want to say something too.
I’ve blogged a lot in the past few years. I’m hardly an expert, but here are some things I’ve learned:
– I have terrible, terrible taste. The things I love most are seen by a majority of other bloggers as generic, repetitive or disappointing. Resonant Blue is a huge example of this. People hated that single and were rage-quitting all over the place, but I LOVED it. I still love it. This happens so often that I’m starting to think I just have poor taste and nothing can be done about it. Apparently I have no critical ear when it comes to music. No standards when it comes to pvs…the list goes on. *shrugs* I’ve come to terms. I like what I like and I have no interest in pretending otherwise.
– Pic Spamming is fun, but people don’t tend to comment on them as much. This makes me a sad panda.
– I’m not popular, important, or controversial enough to get flamed. Or trolled. And that is fine by me. I used to be so careful about not being offensive to potential readers, but once I realized I’m not popular at all, I got over myself about it. I’ve been called names now and then, but I’ve really not had anything worse than people correcting me (in a way that could be read as snooty), or saying I’m mean/wrong. Often people will comment as though they haven’t even read what I wrote and address maybe one sentence out of context with a giant wall of text. It makes me want to reply with: “um, you can get your own blog, you know…”
– I don’t delete the not-so-nice comments because…hey, it’s a reaction. I’m grateful that anyone has ever taken the time to respond to something I’ve written. Some times, buried in all the hostility, the person has a point. Or it’s just funny. Some times I respond, but I never, ever argue. There is no right answer, just opinions. I love comments. I get them so rarely that even not-so-nice ones don’t keep me upset for as long as they might.
– Most of the people who find this site have been looking for ‘jailbait’ and because of that ONE POST they end up here. Ugh. I won’t even tell you some of the other disgusting (and alarming) search terms that have led people here. I can only laugh and say, “HAH, you perves are S.O.L!” *
– When I write something specifically to get comments, I feel stupid and re-write it, because that is stupid. I’ve always written in here when I had something to say, or something I was thinking about…if I don’t approach it like that, it’s not fun anymore.
– My earlier posts make me cringe. You can so tell I was finding my feet back then.
– My site will never be as pretty, professional, or concise as others. I write a lot and I have a lot of pics in these posts. I recognize that most people don’t want to sit there and read thousands of words by some crazy internet chick. So, to the people that do read them, THANK YOU!!!
– Forums seem like scary places that would make me hate the fandom. At the same time, I wish I had more people to chat about H!P with.
– Don’t write series’ unless you’re actually prepared to continue them. I’ve attempted several and lost interest about the second post in. I think maybe ONE is still going. I really need to stop being stupid about that. If I’m ever going to do another series, I promise I’ll have two or three posts ready before I even mention it. That way I won’t keep failing so hard.
– I love making headers. LOVE it. I will happily make them for others. It’s just fun. Idols are pretty, so we will never run out of material.
– The most important thing is to just keep writing. Honestly, if you like this blogging thing, and you’re in it because you just want to talk about idols (or whatever), just keep posting. Don’t think about comments or hits or all that. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. Enjoy it. The only way you’ll get comfortable or find a style is to keep going.
For me, if I didn’t enjoy writing, or capping, or thinking too hard about silly idol things that I know are largely irrelevant, I wouldn’t do this. Sure, it would be great if every entry got me hundreds of hits and lots of pleasant comments. But I’d rather post something I’m happy with that even one person reads and enjoys.
I still have my most important reader, after all.
He’s probably rolling his eyes as he reads this.
But he’s reading it.
* – S.O.L means ‘shit outta luck’ for those of you who are classy and don’t know terms like that.